The Kirby Ceilidh

Please take the floor the caller said,
  For the first ceilidh dance
So up gets Phil and brother, Mike
  And they began to prance.
Then Richard and Phil's brother, Steve,
  Appeared on the dance floor,
Though Steve confessed he had never been
  To a ceilidh dance before!
Now Phil, if my memory serves me correct,
  Has a history of ceilidh mishaps,
For once a girl's hair he had caught
  Very firmly in his watch strap.
Tonight, though, he was being good
  And doing rather well with his brother,
Until, that is, we all noticed
  The men all dancing with each other!
The caller very patiently took the floor
  To teach Richard his left hand from his right,
But Richard, Steve, Phil, Mike and others
  Were having a real good laugh that night.
So it was left to the ladies
  To show them how it was really done
And a really enjoyable ceilidh,
  Was had by everyone.

(Maureen West 2014)